The Internet Book Club

When I was younger and my parents upset me, I used to tell them that I couldn’t wait to put them in a home. I doubt there was a lot of forceful threat in my voice given that I was around 12 at the time, but my uncles and cousins insist I sure was funny. In fact, Uncle Ralph even brought home all these brochures for senior living Atlanta, senior living Chicago, and senior living Miami. He tacked a few up on the fridge with magnets and handed me the rest, telling me to flash them to my parents whenever they got me mad. So when they told when I was 15 that only rich people paid for driving school and then got their licenses, I whipped the Miami brochure out of my pocket and pitched it up into their faces, screaming, “I’m putting you in a home to die! To die! I hate you! I hate you!” Naturally, this did not lead to me going to driving school and getting a license. I did since I dipped into my savings and paid for it myself, but that’s not the point. I made my mother break down crying and my father just stared at me. If they had just told me that they didn’t want to pay for it, I would have respected that decision. But the fact that they lied to me and it wasn’t even a good lie is what really angered me.